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The days of camping, golden tench, and Casa Roberto’s
I was chatting to my old mate Stewart the other day and we got to on to the subject of eating out. I say chatting, people don’t really chat anymore as messenger and WhatsApp have killed the voice. When the great Cliff Richard wrote, ‘it’s so funny, we don’t talk anymore’, was he offering us a dark forecast of a dystopian future? Probably not. Anyway, the Facebook messenger conversation started with a picture of a golden tench that ...
The Confusing World of Football Hypocrisy
Most reasonable people hate the fact that the World Cup is being played in Qatar. We know it is bent but how many of us can resist watching it? I hoped England would be crap yesterday so I could pretend I didn’t care. However, the bastards played well, meaning I am now hooked into it. My Hypocrisy I justify my hypocrisy by watching it on ‘free to air’ and stating that the real villains are FIFA, not football supporters. I know, I ...
Johnson Undergoes Rectum Surgery to Remove MP’s
Boris Johnson has undergone emergency surgery to have MP's and former cabinet ministers from his anal passage, it has been revealed. Gucci Shoe Johnson fell ill in the early hours of the morning, with his wife, Carrie, calling ambulance services after discovering a Gucci shoe poking out of his dirtbox. It is thought to be owned by Zac Goldsmith. At this stage of what is a complex operation, surgeons are not certain how many MP's are up ...
The Myth of Individualism
I don’t know if anyone reading this listens to podcasts, but I find them quite interesting. What’s good about them I find, is that you can jump back to them at any time. Sideways Recently, I have been listening to a series of podcasts called ‘Sideways’. It was written and narrated by Mathew Syed. Syed is something of a brainbox who first came to my attention when I read his book, ‘Bounce – The Myth of Talent and the Power of ...
Liz Trussterfuck and Her Growth Policy That No One Wants
A while back, I was talking to a surgeon I know through cricket. He talked of an obsession with growth and people’s inability to understand that resources aren’t infinite. Not long after, David Attenborough spoke of the same thing. Anti-growth Coalition At the Tory Party conference last week, a new phrase came to the fore. It was called the ‘Anti-growth Coalition’. It was meant to have the same impact as ‘Get Brexit Done’ ...