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A View From the Chaise Longue – It’s Tears Again!
I met a couple of my son George’s friends in Winchester yesterday. On a busy and buoyant Christmas afternoon the temptation was there to hang about and watch the game. However, the chaise longue had served England well and to desert it now would surely mean defeat. That’s right, England's fate rested on me staying loyal to a piece of furniture. Uneasy Confidence During the drive home, I felt an almost uneasy sense of confidence. ...
View from the chaise longue – England restore calm to win at a canter
It was red wine and the chaise longue for the culture vulture again last night. Yet again, I didn't feel physically and mentally equipped to go out in the cold and into a pub of football experts. I don’t know why, but hearing someone shout “GET GREALISH ON!”, every 20 seconds, seems more tolerable in the summer. Perhaps it's because you can escape to the garden when it is warmer? I must admit, I spent the hours before the Senegal game ...
The days of camping, golden tench, and Casa Roberto’s
I was chatting to my old mate Stewart the other day and we got to on to the subject of eating out. I say chatting, people don’t really chat anymore as messenger and WhatsApp have killed the voice. When the great Cliff Richard wrote, ‘it’s so funny, we don’t talk anymore’, was he offering us a dark forecast of a dystopian future? Probably not. Anyway, the Facebook messenger conversation started with a picture of a golden tench that ...
The Confusing World of Football Hypocrisy
Most reasonable people hate the fact that the World Cup is being played in Qatar. We know it is bent but how many of us can resist watching it? I hoped England would be crap yesterday so I could pretend I didn’t care. However, the bastards played well, meaning I am now hooked into it. My Hypocrisy I justify my hypocrisy by watching it on ‘free to air’ and stating that the real villains are FIFA, not football supporters. I know, I ...
Johnson Undergoes Rectum Surgery to Remove MP’s
Boris Johnson has undergone emergency surgery to have MP's and former cabinet ministers from his anal passage, it has been revealed. Gucci Shoe Johnson fell ill in the early hours of the morning, with his wife, Carrie, calling ambulance services after discovering a Gucci shoe poking out of his dirtbox. It is thought to be owned by Zac Goldsmith. At this stage of what is a complex operation, surgeons are not certain how many MP's are up ...