Lately, I’ve been wondering: is immigration truly the problem it’s often painted as? After all, with 20 years of experience working alongside immigrants and a few family members who’ve had a front-row seat at the Home Office, I’ve got some insights to share.

A Quick Jaunt Through History

Let’s kick off with a little history lesson. Immigration, as we know it, really got going during the age of colonisation. Back then, European powers—Britain, France, Germany, Belgium, Spain—were like kids in a sweet shop, grabbing territories all over the globe, often without so much as a polite “Do you mind if we take this?”

Britain, in its infinite wisdom, came up with the Commonwealth—a name that rather cheekily suggests we were all in this together for the common good. Spoiler alert: the lion’s share of the ‘common wealth’ ended up in Britain’s pockets. But let’s not let facts get in the way of a good story.

When we needed help, particularly during and after the World Wars, those Commonwealth countries dutifully pitched in. We invited (yes, invited) builders, nurses, bus drivers, shopkeepers, and factory workers to the UK to help us rebuild. Without these migrant workers, Britain’s post-war recovery would have dragged on, and the NHS might still be a pipe dream.

The EU: Keeping the Peace and the Plumbers Flowing

After the war, Europe thought, “Let’s make sure we never go through that again,” and thus, the early versions of the European Union were born. The idea was that by tying everyone together, it’d be a lot harder for any one country to throw a wobbly and start another war. This cooperation evolved into free trade, freedom of movement, and for most EU countries, one currency (though the UK said, “Thanks, but no thanks”).

Then in 2016, Britain decided we wanted our country back. From whom, you ask? Excellent question. It’s not like Brussels packed up Britain and relocated it across the Channel.

Brexit was, shall we say, a bit of a shambles. Among the many things overlooked was something called “The Dublin Agreement.” This agreement allowed EU member states to return migrants to the country they first entered. Now that we’re out, we’ve lost the privilege of sending unwanted visitors back to where they came from. So, they’re our guests for good or ill.

A System in Shambles and the Hotel Fiasco

The UK’s immigration system was already on the brink, thanks to years of austerity and neglect. With processing backlogs mounting, the government did what any sensible administration would do: they outsourced the problem. Contractors were brought in to house immigrants in hotels, B&Bs, and even on ships. Now, these aren’t exactly five-star accommodations; more like the kind of places you’d expect on a really bad stag do. Some contractors are raking in the cash from this, which is enough to make any conspiracy theorist rub their hands with glee. Create a problem, make some money.

That said, it’s potentially less about nefarious plotting and more about plain old incompetence. Contractors have still made a fortune out of misery though, often the same ones we fondly remember from the good old days of Covid 19 (remember Serco Test & Trace?)

How Do We Fix This?

So, what’s the new government supposed to do with this shitshow? Well, for starters, they need to fix the immigration system and clear the backlog. That means investing time and money where it counts, instead of just lining the pockets of contractors. We also need to patch things up with our former EU mates. Despite the Brexit bust-up, the EU was never really our enemy. Whether you’re a fan of Starmer or not, he’s got a chance to rebuild these bridges since he wasn’t part of the Brexit bonfire that Johnson and his mob caused.

Once the system’s sorted, the hotels will start to empty out, and immigrants can either integrate into the UK economy or, if they’re dangerous, be deported. But let’s be honest: proper gangsters don’t arrive by inflatable dinghy. They’re more likely to jet in on a private plane, having already fleeced desperate refugees out of their last pennies. 99.9% of people on plastic boats just want to rebuild their shattered lives, not rape your elderly parents or steal your house.

The Real Villains

So, when thugs, egged on by populist loudmouths, start smashing up mosques and immigration centres, they’re snarling up the wrong tree. If they feel let down by the immigration system, they should be directing their anger at the government that let it fall apart. Statistically, most immigrants are just refugees looking for a safer, better life, and they’re more than ready to fill jobs that the rock-throwers at Greggs wouldn’t touch with a shitty stick.

And for those worried about a few bad apples among the immigrants—those who might be criminals—they’ve only slipped through because the system’s broken. As for those who think sinking boats is the answer, not only is that barbaric, but it’s also illegal. Plus, if we start behaving like a rogue state, our trading partners will drop us quicker than you can say “sovereignty,” leaving us isolated and poorer than a church mouse whose just lost his disability allowance.

The Way Forward

To sum up, immigration isn’t going away. We need it to grow the economy, and with ongoing global crises like war, famine, and climate change, migration is only going to increase. There’s a certain irony in the fact that the same people rioting against immigrants are often the ones denying climate change—the very thing that’s going to make migration a bigger issue.

In the end, anyone who’s worked with immigrants as much as I have quickly realises that people are just people. If someone has made it from Syria to the UK via boats, trains, lorries, and dinghies, they’ve probably got more grit and determination than those setting fire to children’s libraries or nicking pasties from Greggs.

Perhaps their anger comes from knowing, deep down, that they’d never survive that journey themselves.