“I feel very strongly that our opposition to racism and to sexism and our support for equality before the law and an independent judiciary are hugely important considerations in the House of Commons.”

Take all your political preferences away, read that sentence again, and tell me if it is not politically impartial.

That’s where we have come to in this so called great nation. It is a situation where, despite all the screaming and shouting about sovereignty and being told to sit down and shut up if you voted to remain in the EU, the speaker is not allowed to express what should be, pretty much, a standard cross party view, unless of course you are one of those wonky looking UKIP types.

Once again, take all your political allegiances away and convince me (take as long as you like) that if Britain hadn’t decided to exit the EU, Theresa May would have more or less sprinted on to a jet, raced to Philadelphia, and grabbed the same hand that has grabbed some pussy and signed off paperwork for race discrimination, tax fraud, and multiple, calculated bankruptcies.

Roll this right back to election day in May 2015 and amongst the allegations of alternative facts and fake news from all political parties, here is the truth.

David Cameron won the election and called a EU referendum to appease the right-wing nutters in his party; he thought he couldn’t lose.

Boris Johnson and Michael Gove knifed him in the back and Nigel Farage did what he always does, he played a tune of Olde England to racists.

On a whim 52% of British people who were a bit angry about stuff, voted on a subject they would never begin to understand the complexities of and shouldn’t have been put in the position to try (That’s why we vote in Government every 4 years, they are well paid to do the complex stuff for us).

American angry people, some inspired by Brexit, voted for a maniac, rather than the established order, sending the world to its most uncertain period since the Cuban missile crisis (1962)

Theresa May raced to America (a country promising protectionism) in the panic stricken hope of coming away with some sort of Brexit softening deal. It was all a bit like going to Harrods and coming away with a paper bag full of rhubarb and custards.

Parliament, then, after sovereign law was enforced (courtesy of Gina Miller) had to vote on whether a peoples advisory (administered by 52%of voters) was a wise choice for Britain moving forward. This is called Article 50 (the point of no return).

The MP’s who had been behind the Leave campaign, as you would expect, voted to trigger Article 50 but this left 75% of parliament (including the PM and the leader of the opposition) who voted to Remain…what would they do?

Vote to trigger Article 50 of course…well not all of them. A few of them actually voted with their conscience, believing that morally, they could not vote to trigger something they had vehemently opposed less than a year ago.

Along with judges (including a gay one who liked archery) who implemented the sovereign law the Brexit brigade wanted, then didn’t want, these MP’s, according to The Daily Mail, were now enemies of the state, soon to be joined by another one, John Bercow, who is now a traitorous bastard because he doesn’t have much time for maniacs.

Meanwhile, as winter passes the halfway stage, hospital A&E wards have queues backing up to the M25, presumably because everyone wants a slice of the action coming from the £350 million a week promised on the side of a bus.

A trip to A&E is like they have built an ALDI in a hospital. There is a genuine scattering of people who have been in accidents and a few who look like they need to be treated as a matter of urgency. Then there is a large majority who have turned up with a runny nose or an earache, or because Jeremy Kyle has finished and there is nothing else to do.

I think we need to explain in more detail what the letters A and E mean, then tell people that if they haven’t been in an accident that is an emergency, they should fuck off and let doctors and nurses get on with the important stuff, like saving peoples lives. It doesn’t help when mental health is at an all time high and its services are being starved of funding.

The more these people block up the NHS system, the more ammunition there is for those who want to sell it to American investors who will rape and pillage it until you local hospital is a pile of rubble and you have to pay a thousand pounds to have an ingrowing toenail removed…but you will get a free chocolate biscuit. On the subject of chocolate (what a great segway) If you think American investment is good for Britain, I suggest you read up on Cadburys.

Perhaps all these non accident or emergency people voted Brexit because their local Ukip representative told them that the £350 million a week from the side of the bus would be dished out, in cash, at their local hospital?

It sounds ridiculous but watch the news or read the papers and tell me what isn’t ridiculous anymore.

Catch me next week when I will be interviewing some turkeys who voted for Christmas.