One of the advantages of being the youngest of five children is that I assumed from an early age Jimmy Saville was a pervert. Because of the power and influence my elder Brothers had over me, I had no desire whatsoever to spend an afternoon meeting the England football team whilst a BBC producer fixed it for Jim to put his hands down my 1970’s nylon Y Fronts. My brother’s, Bruce and Graham, like all elder brothers, could be right bastards sometimes but the fact is, they made it plainly clear to me that they thought Saville was a raging sex offender who was best avoided.

What amazes me is that the Great British public were apparently unaware that a man who never courted women, wore nothing under a tracksuit except a gold chain, called his mother “The Duchess” and mixed in the company of Gary Glitter could be anything else than a great bloke?  After all he raised money running marathon’s for charity, what a great guy? Unbelievably, despite the daily evidence, there are still people in denial about Saville’s behaviour, I find that totally extraordinary and an insult to the people who are finally exposing him. One woman on the radio last week even claimed it was evil to talk ill of the dead…One presumes that she thinks that despite his odd ways, Adolf Hitler wasn’t a bad bloke once you got to know him?

Saville: Hideous, cretinous creature

It is now apparent that during this period the corridors of power in every major institution that had involvement with children was rife with abusers, be it schools, scouts clubs, the Catholic church or indeed the BBC, nicknamed “Auntie” for reasons that are beyond me…Perhaps being known as an auntie encouraged more kids to come along and join in the party? Fortunately for me my parents were non religious and my brothers had made enough malicious allegations about our scout leader for me to treat him with the same suspicion as Sir Jim. However, one place that couldn’t be avoided was state school, home to class A perverts who delivered regular beatings of bare bottomed boys with saliva dripping from their chins, often with at best, dubious reasoning.

I had already been caned bare bottomed by Mr Searing at Burnham Copse School but my real day of perverted fame came at the hands (or should I say over the hands) of Mr Evans, the Welsh headmaster at the Hurst School in Baughurst. After a playground spat with my friend Kev, we were ordered to his office to be suitably admonished for a disagreement that lasted a matter of seconds. Evans deliberated on our punishment for some time before eventually deciding that the best course of action was not for him to cane us, but for us to alternately cane each other on our bare bottoms as he urged us to strike each other harder. We were eleven years old and informed that if the details of the punishment went further than that room, the real trouble would commence. My mother, a liberal, would have caused absolute fucking carnage had she discovered this at the time but I was too scared to tell her.

Evans left rather abruptly a year or so later (I wonder why?) but I was at least left with the consolation that a friend of mine (who will remain anonymous) broke in to the school through the roof and had a huge turd in his desk drawer, a legendary moment in Hurst school folklore. This moment of child abuse became compartmentalised for several years and has never really been an issue to me because as far as I can remember he never touched us. It only came out again in our respective Best Man’s speeches as ideal material for easy hand over mouth shocked laughter. However, it is an indication of how rife child abuse was and possibly still is, so, If like me, you have been involved in kids sports and other activities and you have cursed at the attention to detail you have to give when filling out a CRB (Criminal records Bureau) form, it is worth remembering that this system was brought in to protect kids from the likes of Jimmy Saville, Gary Glitter and indeed Mr Evans…No child should be allowed to have their body violated by any form of sexual or violent abuse.

However, before we all get carried away and think that abuse of children is from a bygone era of strange headmasters, pop stars, scout leaders and TV presenters, look no further than what has happened in Rochdale recently. If you can bare to read about the sexual violence carried out on young girls without being sick, you will be shocked how the systematic failure of the police and authorities allowed it to be deemed that these girls somehow deserved what they were getting because of their deprived backgrounds. It beggars belief but it is evidence that here and now in 21st century Britain, child abuse is alive and kicking and it is certain  that more shocking revelations and allegations will come out in the months and years ahead.

So, the next time you are asked to complete a CRB form, remember that no matter what a nuisance it is, it is there for a good reason.