I don’t really use Twitter, I have never really got in to the habit of it, but it seems, certainly amongst the younger generation, to be far more popular than Facebook and other social media, not least to my eldest son, George. I was searching for something about Reading FC on there today when I came across an account called @lethaby. As you can imagine, Lethaby is not a common name so intrigue took me on to it and sure enough, it was my adorable eldest son, a regular tweeter.

It appears that he is quite a fan of Twitter because he has made 16,889 tweets, he has 667 followers and he follows 723 people. He generally has something to say most days and can be quite opinionated (I am not really sure where he gets that from) but whilst some of the tweets are generally funny, others had me pacing the room wanting to get my hands on the little fucker, luckily for him he is out of harms reach at the Reading festival.

Here are some of my favourites:

• Time to get the drink on 😉
• Time for my last healthy shit before Reading (festival) just letting you know
• Passed every GCSE with minimum effort, boom
• This time in an hour I’ll know exactly how my ‘fuck revision’ technique for exam preparation went for me
• I think my dad’s secretly a Chelsea supporter, his tongue couldn’t get much further up their arse
• Need to get back out but my dad won’t shut up
• Kept up my record of never seeing an attractive girl who plays cricket, just doesn’t happen
• Just to confirm, the girl that got me out wasn’t good, just your everyday pie chucking spastic

And my favourite, an emotional one to tug at the heart strings this:

• However many times I tell my dad I’ve had enough of Sunday cricket this summer the cunt never listens.

That comment did come after getting out to someone he alleged was an unattractive female who was a pie throwing spastic and I have to admit it was a Sunday friendly match I had forced him in to playing because I had no-one else. I was quite relieved to see “Can’t believe my competitive cricket season’s over now, gutted” after he played last Saturday, it would be a waste if he gave it all up, which it appears he wont.

I stopped reading his tweets after I got to the comments from about a week ago as the gushing compliments towards me had me wiping the tears of joy from my cheeks and also because too much information about his social life will have me waking up screaming in the night……as a parent, some things are best left unseen.

What happened?….I was such a nice boy at that age!