Last night I had a terrible dream inspired by a programme on Radio 4 last night hosted by Clive Anderson with two City financiers and and a Partner in a Business law firm. Basically speaking, we are going bust boys and girls, and it is too late to do much about it, and this inspired my dream.

I had a very clear vision of Britain’s banking industry being subject to hostile take over by a Russian and Chinese billionaire’s who had already positioned themselves in the bankrupt country of Iceland. Russia had already advanced across Europe hitting stern resistance in Germany and Poland, but waltzing through France, Italy (who quickly became an ally) and Spain, positioning themselves in the Bay of Biscay and the English Channel.

The rejection of the takeover by the British government caused the Chinese and Russians to declare war on the UK and everyman under 50 was t prepare himself form hand to hand combat with these fuckers pictured below. The dream only became less real when combat began and I accidentally shot the unfortunate Clive Anderson in the back. Then I woke up not feeling to good about myself.

Then, again on Radio 4 this morning (it’s so educational!) I heard Melvyn Bragg read this “Modest Proposal” by Johnathon Swift (below) as a solution to the 1729 famine in Ireland. Click here for the full proposal, but here is an extract to give you an idea.

”I have been assured by a very knowing American of my acquaintance in London, that a young healthy child well nursed is at a year old a most delicious, nourishing, and wholesome food, whether stewed, roasted, baked, or boiled …” Fucking hell…………..and he meant it!!

At least things aren’t that bad…………………………Yet!!!
I will quote “The Independent” headline today.

IT JUST GETS WORSE AND WORSE…………………………

• Global economy faces sharpest decline for 60 years
• Experts warn that 50 million world job losses
• UK expected to shrink faster than any other advanced nation
• Taxes set to rise by £20bn a year to plug public spending holes

Apparently, and thankfully, my kids are beyond the age of eating.